Dating Ads for Seniors found in a Florida Newspaper

August 3, 2013 Seniors

You can say what you want about Florida , but you never hear of anyone retiring and moving north. These are actual ads seen in ”The Villages” Florida newspaper. (Who says seniors don’t have a sense of humor?)

FOXY LADY:
Sexy, fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty, 80’s,
slim, 5’4′ (used to be 5’6′),
Searching for sharp-looking, sharp-dressing companion.
Matching white shoes and belt a plus.

LONG-TERM COMMITMENT:
Recent widow who has just buried fourth husband,
Looking for someone to round out a six-unit plot.
Dizziness, Fainting, shortness of breath not a
problem.

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SERENITY NOW:
I am into solitude, long walks, sunrises, the ocean,
yoga and Meditation.
If you are the silent type, let’s get together,
Take our hearing aids out and enjoy quiet times.

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WINNING SMILE:
Active grandmother with original teeth seeking a
dedicated flossier To share rare steaks, corn on the cob and
caramel candy.

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BEATLES OR STONES?
I still like to rock, still like to cruise in my
Camaro on Saturday nights and still like to play the guitar.
If you were a groovy chick, or are now a groovy hen,
let’s get together and listen to my eight-track
tapes.

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MEMORIES:
I can usually remember Monday through Thursday.
If you can remember Friday, Saturday and Sunday,
let’s put our two headsTogether.

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MINT CONDITION:

Male, 1932 model , high mileage, good condition,
some hair, Many new parts including hip, knee, cornea,
valves. Isn’t in running condition, but walks well.